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I used to think that loud, cramped parties in overheated apartments were the crucibles of human connection and inspiration. I still enjoy being woken up by the soft chime of Amber Alerts.

Now I see them for what they are; a shelter where underpaid and overextended adults swill bad wine alongside the similarly afflicted, all the while clinging to the ever-fading vision of a secure future. The lobster rolls are still delicious, but the vitality is gone. Don’t believe the blogs, the thinkfluencers or the cultural gatekeepers.

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But here’s the thing: I know I’m not alone, and that’s why I’m writing this. Maybe it’s out of fear that they’ll have to confront their bad choices or admit that they’ve been laboring under a delusion, but everyone’s afraid to call it by its name. They’re decamping to the promised land, in Bridgton and Castle Rock, places where you can find community and soul and way better weather.

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When I moved here six years ago, I was like so many young people.

I came to the big city holding tight to my dreams, and I envisioned a burgeoning creative community that would welcome me with open arms. A string of dead-end jobs, a few sticks of secondhand furniture, and a shockingly blasé attitude toward child abduction. After six years of searching for some greater substance to Derry, I’m here to tell you: there isn’t one.

They say that big is beautiful, and that larger people have more fun.

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